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So some things have been happening (of course things always do).
One such thing is that I have a shiny new job which I start in five days, however I'm cripplingly anxious about it as it is PR work - something which requires a lot more social skills than I possess.
Another happening has been that I've started a 30 day challenge - to wake up before 9am each day. Add to that the lack of drinking that August will bring (full time PR work is EXHAUSTING so my social life will have to be limited to weekends only, I think) and the fact that I'm Really Really Trying with the whole healthy eating thing (aka managing 5-a-day no bother, cooking more vegetable based meals from scratch) and I'm hoping my physical health is going to take an upward turn. I'm not unhealthy, per se, I just know that the healthier you are physically, the more likely it is that your mental health will benefit. Would like to incorporate exercise into my daily activities but aside from the odd bit of yoga here and there it really isn't likely to happen.
And a final happening is that I'm starting a Proper Blog. I'm still gonna keep this account alive (not that I think anybody really is particularly interested anyway) but this account is for my creative writing and I would like to have a real life events based blog, one where I discuss my travels, my daily adventures and just general topical issues, such as the matter of my country's independence which is hot on everyone's lips right now. So yeah, that's what I'm planning at the moment - blog, healthiness, new job and of course lots and lots of reading.
If anybody would like to read my blog then feel free to ask for the link!
Hope everyone's well and as always if anybody wants any feedback or even just someone to look at their work, I'm always here!
Peace and love, stay classy.
One such thing is that I have a shiny new job which I start in five days, however I'm cripplingly anxious about it as it is PR work - something which requires a lot more social skills than I possess.
Another happening has been that I've started a 30 day challenge - to wake up before 9am each day. Add to that the lack of drinking that August will bring (full time PR work is EXHAUSTING so my social life will have to be limited to weekends only, I think) and the fact that I'm Really Really Trying with the whole healthy eating thing (aka managing 5-a-day no bother, cooking more vegetable based meals from scratch) and I'm hoping my physical health is going to take an upward turn. I'm not unhealthy, per se, I just know that the healthier you are physically, the more likely it is that your mental health will benefit. Would like to incorporate exercise into my daily activities but aside from the odd bit of yoga here and there it really isn't likely to happen.
And a final happening is that I'm starting a Proper Blog. I'm still gonna keep this account alive (not that I think anybody really is particularly interested anyway) but this account is for my creative writing and I would like to have a real life events based blog, one where I discuss my travels, my daily adventures and just general topical issues, such as the matter of my country's independence which is hot on everyone's lips right now. So yeah, that's what I'm planning at the moment - blog, healthiness, new job and of course lots and lots of reading.
If anybody would like to read my blog then feel free to ask for the link!
Hope everyone's well and as always if anybody wants any feedback or even just someone to look at their work, I'm always here!
Peace and love, stay classy.
I'm insane.
I'm too old for this shit.
From the age of ten I've felt as though I'm constantly being compared to prettier friends, measured up against them and repeatedly being dismissed as not good enough, average, or the ugly one. It's not paranoia, it's true.
When I was ten I was this chubby kid with a massive forehead who developed too fast and had zits before anybody else.
When I was twelve, I didn't realise tying your hair up every day made you look hideous, so I did it. Boys would ask me out, and I'm pretty certain it was just for a laugh, as in let's ask out that ugly girl so that when she says yes we can laugh at her. I said no, sometimes with a snigger or a laugh
Sudden feelings of contempt and self ridicule?
The past couple of weeks have been weirdly stable for me. It's an easily disguised gut feeling of innate wrongness rather than an all consuming and uncontrollable need to do something stupid.
I'm forever careening between total love for and acceptance of all the people around me: some days it is enough to have the friends and relationships that I do, but some days I feel horribly disgustingly lonely and I wish that I had someone or somewhere to run to and be enveloped by, someone who knows exactly what to do to pull me out of that ditch, but someone who is magically exempt from this unshakable and persistent feeling. I'll be sitting with s
Existential crap/thought organisation.
A mixture of beautiful and frightening things are going on in my life at the moment. Creatively, things are looking up. I have the blind poetics open mic night in less than two weeks, so I'll be reading something of my own aloud for the first time. On top of that, I managed a five page doodle over the past two days. It's just a silly comic strip, but at least it has an original (if slightly ridiculous) plotline. Now that Dan's back in my life, I'm spending more time on photography because sometimes we go and take pictures together. That gives me a chance to be in front of the camera too.
However, in terms of the nitty gritty real stuff,
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How's the job going? The blog sounds awesome!! I'd be interested in having a nosey at it